Thursday, May 9, 2013
Famous author joins the 51 percent club
7:47 AM | 
Posted by
Bruny Hudson |
By Hobo Hudson
Satire
I am proud to announce that I have joined the 51 percent club and have pledged to donate at least 51 percent of my assets to worthy charities.
When followers of the 51 percent club first approached me some time back, I gave them a very fast no because there is no way that I would donate over half my wealth after working so hard to earn the bones. They assured me, however, that I don’t have to donate anything today but only to put down in my will that 51 percent or more would go to charities of my choice. These charities could include any legitimate group, or I could form my own charitable foundation and nominate the dog of my choice to run it.
This information put joining the club into an entirely different light. I could spend any bones I want now and enjoy life to the fullest and only give away a portion of the bones left when I go to the bridge. The great publicity this simple act generates will probably help me sell another million copies of my book, The Richest Dog In Town, so everything seems to be positive with no drawbacks.
I have therefore put my paw print to the pledge and it is effective immediately. My attorney, Ms. Foley Monster, has set up a variety of trusts to accomplish my needs. The trusts are as follows:
1. The Hobo Hudson’s Cat Trust. Since I want to be certain that my old cat employees are able to enjoy a dignified old age, I have set up this trust to insure that adequate funds are available to insure their care in perpetuity. This trust has been funded with one million bones. Since cats can’t be trusted to manage funds, all income will be paid to me during my lifetime and I will be trustee. Upon my death, all income will be paid to Mom and Dad and they will be trustees. Upon the death of the last cat, the trust will be dissolved and the corpus will be transferred to the Hobo Hudson Family Trust.
2. The Hobo Hudson Family Trust has been initially funded with 20 million bones, and I may decide to add more funds at a later date. I am the trustee and all earnings will be paid to me during my lifetime. Upon my death, Mom and Dad will become trustees, and they may take unlimited funds from the trust, including income and corpus as they may require. Upon their deaths, all remaining funds will be transferred to the Hobo Hudson Foundation for distribution.
3. The Hobo Hudson
After putting my pawprint onto these checks, I received a bark from my banker saying my account was overdrawn by 18 bones, so I borrowed 20 bones from Dad to keep my account solvent until I receive the next royalty payment on my book.
This sounds sort of like some of the hooman members, doesn’t it?
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1 comments:
You forgot the part where all these foundations have to name me managing partner.
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