Monday, August 22, 2011

Doggy humor: A letter from the White House

By Hobo Hudson

When I pawed through my mail this morning, I saw a very fancy envelope with a return address of The White House, Washington, D.C.  Knowing this must be important, I instantly tore it open to find a letter addressed to me from Michele Obama. The letter read as follows:

“Dear Hobo Hudson,
The Surgeon General has reported an upsurge in young squirrel obesity in your neighborhood, and I wonder if it has anything to do with your Squirrely Happy Meals. I know you are trying to assist your young squirrels with their nutritional intake and wonder if you would be willing to make a slight change in the content of your meals. If you could cut the boiled peanuts in half and substitute celery sticks, it would be a great step forward in our war against squirrelhood obesity.
Thank you for anything you can do to help the cause.
Michael Obama.”

This came as quite a shock to me because I hadn’t thought about the consequences of the young squirrels’ meals which consisted of parboiled corn, boiled peanuts and also a small toy consisting of either a plastic acorn or a plastic peanut. The squirrel moms loved the meals, saying the toys provided hours of entertainment to their little squirrels. They push them all around the nest, chew on them to help with their teething and even bury them to start their training in collecting food for the long winters. As for the partially cooked corn and boiled peanuts, the squirrel moms found them easy on their children’s developing teeth and also easier on their developing digestion systems.

Of course, I was willing to do anything to help Mrs. Obama. Following her suggestion, I immediately began planning for the changeover but hit a minor problem when I notified my customers about it. The young squirrels all wrinkled their noses and exclaimed, “Celery, ugh,” and their mothers explained to me their kids just won’t eat the stuff.

In order to reach an agreement, we all put our heads together and came up with the perfect solution. I will start selling small orders of boiled peanuts as a side order and the little squirrels can just leave the celery on their plates and eat the side orders of peanuts. That way, everyone is satisfied.

Yep, I think this is a great solution. Michael Obama will be happy; the squirrel kids will be happy and I’ll really be happy because my sales will increase.




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About Hobo


This was Hobo Hudson, my doggy brother, a little terrier mix with black fur. He became famous after his first attempt at writing stories, which was an article published in the newsletter of our local animal shelter, the same shelter in which I ended up years later before Hobo and his parents adopted me. Hobo’s fame quickly spread as he made a name for himself as a business dog and an adventurer. To keep his memory alive, my doggy sister, my three kitty siblings and I, Wylie Hudson, are continuing his blog. Our mom is the blog’s editor.

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